Fake Sufferer X Mind Poisoner: Attention Seeker

this has been a very popular term

among my circle recently

even brought up in lecturer just now

why are people sharing and talking exceedingly

over the social network sites?

 

after going through the information as below

they are all so true

what the hell…

I just feel like puking

there are way too many people like this

to fit into each and every category

and even myself

is committing some of these behaviours

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The following styles of attention seeking have been identified:

• Extroverted positive overt style – associated with narcissism, bragging and boasting. May also include shocking exhibitionist behavior such as streaking.
• Extroverted positive subdued style – similar but more subtle such as wearing designer clothes, wearing sexy clothes or dominating the conversation.
• Extroverted negative overt style – to gain pity and reassurance.
• Extroverted negative subdued style – making a negative statement to the world by, for example, dressing in an unusual style.

 

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Different characteristics:

• sufferer
• saviour
• rescuer
• organizer
• manipulator
• mind poisoner
• drama queen
• busy bee
• feigner
• false confessor
• abused
• online victim
• victim

The sufferer:

this might include feigning or exaggerating illness,

playing on an injury, or perhaps

causing or inviting injury,

in extreme cases going as far as losing a limb.

Severe cases may meet the diagnostic criteria for

Munchausen Syndrome

(also know as Factitious Disorder).

 

The illness or injury becomes a vehicle for

gaining sympathy and thus attention.

The attention-seeker excels in manipulating people

through their emotions, especially that of guilt.

It's very difficult not to feel sorry for

someone who relates a plausible tale of

suffering in a sob story or "poor me" drama.

The saviour:

in attention-seeking personality disorders like

Munchausen Syndrome By Proxy

(MSBP, also known as Factitious Disorder By Proxy)

the person creates opportunities to be

centre of attention by intentionally causing harm

to others and then being their saviour,

by saving their life,

and by being such a caring,compassionate person.

Few people realise the injury was deliberate.

 

The MSBP mother or nurse may kill several babies

before suspicions are aroused.

When not in saviour mode,

the saviour may be resentful,

perhaps even contemptuous,

of the person or persons she is saving.

The rescuer:

particularly common in family situations,

(s)he's the one who will dash in and "rescue" people

whenever the moment is opportune -

to himself, that is.

he then gains gratification from

basking in the glory of his humanitarian actions.

he will prey on any person suffering misfortune,

infirmity, illness, injury,

or anyone who has a vulnerability.

 

The act of rescue and thus the opportunities for

gaining attention can be enhanced

if others are excluded from the act of rescue;

this helps create a dependency relationship between

the rescuer and rescued which

can be exploited for further acts of rescue

(and attention) later.

When not in rescue mode,

the rescuer may be resentful, perhaps even

contemptuous, of the person she is rescuing.

The organiser:

she may present herself as the one in charge,

the one organising everything,

the one who is reliable and dependable,

the one people can always turn to.

 

However, the objective is not to help people

(this is only a means to an end) but

to always be the centre of attention.

The manipulator:

he may exploit family relationships,

manipulating others with

guilt and distorting perceptions;

although she may not harm people physically,

she causes everyone to suffer emotional injury.

 

Vulnerable family members are favourite targets.

A common attention-seeking ploy is to

claim she is being persecuted, victimised,

excluded, isolated or ignored

by another family member or group,

perhaps insisting she is the target

of a campaign of exclusion or harassment.

The mind-poisoner:

adept at poisoning peoples' minds by

manipulating their perceptions of others,

especially against the current target.

 

The drama queen:

every incident or opportunity,

no matter how insignificant, is exploited, exaggerated

and if necessary distorted to

become an event of dramatic proportions.

Everything is elevated to crisis proportions.

 

Histrionics may be present where

the person feels she is not

the centre of attention but should be.

Inappropriate flirtatious behaviour

may also be present.

The busy bee:

this individual is the busiest person

in the world if her constant retelling of

her life is to be believed.

 

Everyday events which are regarded

as normal by normal people

take on epic proportions

as everyone is invited to

simultaneously admire and

commiserate with this oh-so-busy person

who never has a moment to herself,

never has time to sit down, etc.

She's never too busy, though,

to tell you how busy she is.

The feigner:

when called to account and outwitted,

the person instinctively uses the

denial - counterattack - feigning victimhood strategy

to manipulate everyone present,

especially bystanders and those in authority.

 

The most effective method of

feigning victimhood is to

burst into tears,

for most people's instinct is

to feel sorry for them,

to put their arm round them or

offer them a tissue.

There's little more plausible than real tears,

although as actresses know,

it's possible to turn these on at will.

Feigners are adept at using crocodile tears.

 

From years of practice,

attention-seekers often give an

Oscar-winning performance in this respect.

Feigning victimhood is a favourite tactic of

bullies and harassers to

evade accountability and sanction.

 

The false confessor:

this person confesses to crimes

they haven't committed in order to

gain attention from the police and the media.

In some cases people have confessed to

being serial killers, even though

they cannot provide any

substantive evidence of their crimes.

 

Often they will confess to crimes

which have just been reported in the media.

Some individuals are know to the police

as serial confessors.

The false confessor is different from

a person who make a false confession and

admits to a crime of which

they are accused because of

emotional pressure and

inappropriate interrogation tactics.

The abused:

a person claims they are the victim of

abuse, sexual abuse, rape etc

as a way of gaining attention for themselves.

Crimes like abuse and rape

are difficult to prove at the best of times and

their incidence is so common that

it is easy to make a plausible claim as

a way of gaining attention.

The online victim:

this person uses Internet chat rooms and forums to

allege that they've been the victim of

rape, violence, harassment, abuse etc.

The alleged crime is never reported

to the authorities, for obvious reasons.

The facelessness and anonymity of

the Internet suits this type of attention seeker.

 

The victim:

she may intentionally create acts of

harassment against herself,

eg send herself hate mail or

damage her own possessions

in an attempt to incriminate

a fellow employee, a family member, neighbour, etc.

 

Scheming, cunning, devious,

deceptive and manipulative,

she will identify her "harasser" and

produce circumstantial evidence

in support of her claim.

She will revel in the attention she gains and

use her glib charm to

plausibly dismiss any suggestion that

she herself may be responsible.

However, a background check may

reveal that this is not the first time

she has had this happen to her.

 

In many cases the attention-seeker is

a serial bully whose behaviour

contains many of the characteristics

listed under the profile of a serial bully,

especially the Attention-Seeker.

 

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stages of attention seeking:

• Awareness
• Approach
• Escalation
• Extreme Escalation
• Catastrophic Collapse Into Autism

 

1. Awareness

Here, the creature (child, dog, cat, horse) first

becomes aware that the shortfall exists and

begins to look around for a likely “other”

who may fulfil this need.

2. Approach

The creature will get up and

start approaching the other and

make some minor signs that

it is in need of some attention.

 

In an animal,

that would probably be just

coming over and presenting themselves

whilst looking at the other.

3. Escalation

If the other ignores

“refuses to provide the attention energy”

this subtle approach,

creature A will now escalate

its behaviours to “break on through”

the barrier of ignoring –

make sounds, push physically,

engage in behaviours that

have previously worked to “gain attention”.

4. Extreme Escalation

If these higher level behaviours are also ignored,

the need turns to a pain and

will now drive consecutively

more extreme behaviour in turn

in a direct cause and effect relationship.

If the need is high enough,

the creature may even attack.

5. Catastrophic Collapse Into Autism

If still no energy is forthcoming,

the system collapses in on itself

in a catastrophic implosion which

causes severe neurological damage;

the stage beyond rage is autism,

where the creature can

no longer elicit the energy required nor

process it when it is being offered because

of the damage sustained by

the receptors of the energy processing system

during the catastrophe.

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Passive attention seeking

• laziness
• depency
• tired
• shy
• fearful
• self-indulgence
• charmer
• clinger
• good looks

to read more:

The complete table of Passive Attention Seeking

 

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Tactical ignoring,

also known as planned ignoring,

is a behavioral management strategy used

in response to challenging behavior that seeks to

receive attention or to gain a reaction from others.